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LINNYI |
As a woman who used to play soma, I'm interested as I'm sure the other women in game are, as to why certain males feel it's their duty to insult us make lewd remarks and cant understand why these inappropriate comments are acceptable. We are all up for some sort of banter but there is a line.
Is this lack of morals, lack of respect or what? Be interesting to see the comments For example friend keeps saying go on discord so I make an account and log in, within 5 mins i get a PM saying about a 2nd date no idea who this is. They go on making reference to me having dementia which cuts close to home as most who know me are aware that my husband actually has dementia. Then reference to be bring a whore opening my legs for anyone etc etc etc tell me why you would msg someone this?
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[quote="LINNYI"]As a woman who used to play soma, I'm interested as I'm sure the other women in game are, as to why certain males feel it's their duty to insult us make lewd remarks and cant understand why these inappropriate comments are acceptable. We are all up for some sort of banter but there is a line.
Is this lack of morals, lack of respect or what?
Be interesting to see the comments
For example friend keeps saying go on discord so I make an account and log in, within 5 mins i get a PM saying about a 2nd date no idea who this is. They go on making reference to me having dementia which cuts close to home as most who know me are aware that my husband actually has dementia. Then reference to be bring a whore opening my legs for anyone etc etc etc tell me why you would msg someone this?[/quote]
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#1 2019/11/19 07:25:36 |
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CHOJINE |
I have never understood why people feel the need to make lewd remarks in game, especially at the expense of gender / sex / religion / race, there is in game banter and then there is targeted abuse. It would not be accepted in any other area of life and we shouldn’t here.
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[quote="CHOJINE"]I have never understood why people feel the need to make lewd remarks in game, especially at the expense of gender / sex / religion / race, there is in game banter and then there is targeted abuse. It would not be accepted in any other area of life and we shouldn’t here.[/quote]
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#2 2019/11/19 07:29:13 |
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SAL3M |
If you're generally interested then here is my take on it:
I don't actually think that it is a gender issue per se, it is just that the internet is an anonymous place and that brings out the worst in people. If somebody wants to insult you, which they inevitably will on Soma, unfortunately, then they will go for whatever 'main' characteristic they think will get to you the most. If you're a woman it will be your gender, if you're a sexual minority it will be your sexuality, if you're an ethnic minority it will be your ethnicity. You're fat? Well, guess what? It is your weight. I wouldn't read too much into it if I were you.
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[quote="SAL3M"]If you're generally interested then here is my take on it:
I don't actually think that it is a gender issue per se, it is just that the internet is an anonymous place and that brings out the worst in people.
If somebody wants to insult you, which they inevitably will on Soma, unfortunately, then they will go for whatever 'main' characteristic they think will get to you the most.
If you're a woman it will be your gender, if you're a sexual minority it will be your sexuality, if you're an ethnic minority it will be your ethnicity. You're fat? Well, guess what? It is your weight.
I wouldn't read too much into it if I were you.
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#3 2019/11/19 07:35:00 |
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LINNYI |
"SAL3M"If you're generally interested then here is my take on it: I totally understand what you are saying however what justification do they get? Have they some guilt , anger animosity towards females and its transference? Why do these people target certain females do the feel threatened?
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[quote="LINNYI"][quote="SAL3M"]If you're generally interested then here is my take on it:
I don't actually think that it is a gender issue per se it is just that the internet is an anonymous place and that brings out the worst in people.
If somebody wants to insult you, which they inevitably will on Soma, unfortunately, then they will go for whatever 'main' characteristic they think will get to you the most.
If you're a woman it will be your gender, if you're a sexual minority it will be your sexuality, if you're an ethnic minority it will be your ethnicity. You're fat? Well, guess what? It is your weight.
I wouldn't read too much into it if I were you.
[/quote]
I totally understand what you are saying however what justification do they get? Have they some guilt , anger animosity towards females and its transference?
Why do these people target certain females do the feel threatened? [/quote]
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#4 2019/11/19 07:37:58 |
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SAL3M |
"LINNYI""SAL3M"If you're generally interested then here is my take on it: I wouldn't like to say for sure as I'd hope any potentially derogatory statements that I make about anybody for whatever reason are considered within the confines of reasonable 'banter'. For example I use outrageous racial epithets on occasion but it is only ever meant as tongue-in-cheek as when you call something 'gay', at least in my case, I'm actually lampooning the childishness of calling something gay. On the female specific thing; I think it is likely that you may be targeted on this (beyond what I said originally) because females are obviously a minority and people are more inclined to pick on minorities plus you have to account for the fact that there are likely a lot on incel losers on Soma who can't actually get a gf irl lol.
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[quote="SAL3M"][quote="LINNYI"][quote="SAL3M"]If you're generally interested then here is my take on it:
I don't actually think that it is a gender issue per se it is just that the internet is an anonymous place and that brings out the worst in people.
If somebody wants to insult you, which they inevitably will on Soma, unfortunately, then they will go for whatever 'main' characteristic they think will get to you the most.
If you're a woman it will be your gender, if you're a sexual minority it will be your sexuality, if you're an ethnic minority it will be your ethnicity. You're fat? Well, guess what? It is your weight.
I wouldn't read too much into it if I were you.
[/quote]
I totally understand what you are saying however what justification do they get? Have they some guilt , anger animosity towards females and its transference?
Why do these people target certain females do the feel threatened? [/quote]
I wouldn't like to say for sure as I'd hope any potentially derogatory statements that I make about anybody for whatever reason are considered within the confines of reasonable 'banter'.
For example I use outrageous racial epithets on occasion but it is only ever meant as tongue-in-cheek as when you call something 'gay', at least in my case, I'm actually lampooning the childishness of calling something gay.
On the female specific thing; I think it is likely that you may be targeted on this (beyond what I said originally) because females are obviously a minority and people are more inclined to pick on minorities plus you have to account for the fact that there are likely a lot on incel losers on Soma who can't actually get a gf irl lol.
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#5 2019/11/19 07:46:03 |
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CHOJINE |
I think it has more to do with people feeling like they can act however they want at the expense of others, when in reality no one enjoys being the target of abuse or the centre of a horrible joke. People sometimes act badly and make questionable choices when given pseudo anonymity, without really think as to whether their actions will affect others or if they are justified. This can be seen in the reactions of trolls when they are caught out by their anger at potential bans, they know they are caught in the act and they know the potential consequences, which tells me they knew all along that they were acting in an unnecessary manner.
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[quote="CHOJINE"]I think it has more to do with people feeling like they can act however they want at the expense of others, when in reality no one enjoys being the target of abuse or the centre of a horrible joke. People sometimes act badly and make questionable choices when given pseudo anonymity, without really think as to whether their actions will affect others or if they are justified. This can be seen in the reactions of trolls when they are caught out by their anger at potential bans, they know they are caught in the act and they know the potential consequences, which tells me they knew all along that they were acting in an unnecessary manner.[/quote]
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#6 2019/11/19 07:49:33 |
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PROWLER |
It's Occam's Razor Mistress, "Sal3m" is most likely right.
It works the other way around too .... Soma is also a place where friendships are forged and two people can find an affinity between themselves. There have been people who have bonded through Soma (physically and otherwise) and numerous people have met up. Some have gone on holiday together and some even got married. Of course there is the negative side, there is to everything. But, you know, there are people within Soma that have you at heart, right? In the end, Soma is a platform for us all. We are all different and we all behave differently. But, still, we all have something in common ..... we share the same love ..... Soma. How does it go ...? "In all of the universe there are a million million planets. And, in all of them, there are a million million people. And in all of them, there is only one of each of us. Do not forsake the one called Linny" 8) Puppy
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[quote="PROWLER"]It's Occam's Razor Mistress, "Sal3m" is most likely right.
It works the other way around too .... Soma is also a place where friendships are forged and two people can find an affinity between themselves. There have been people who have bonded through Soma (physically and otherwise) and numerous people have met up. Some have gone on holiday together and some even got married.
Of course there is the negative side, there is to everything. But, you know, there are people within Soma that have you at heart, right?
In the end, Soma is a platform for us all. We are all different and we all behave differently. But, still, we all have something in common ..... we share the same love ..... Soma.
How does it go ...? "In all of the universe there are a million million planets. And, in all of them, there are a million million people. And in all of them, there is only one of each of us. Do not forsake the one called Linny"
8)
Puppy[/quote]
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#7 2019/11/19 07:57:49 |
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WOLF8 |
shame them by naming them... then aint you got some cleaning to do?!! x
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#8 2019/11/19 08:35:47 |
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SOMCHAI |
In Tyt, I have seen one such player often referring to "hand Shandys", and another directing the term of "opening your legs" (this example actually involved OP and she joked along with it), this among other sexual innuendo. Little things like this can foster an atmosphere of being allowed to say the wrong things. The female players really need to call zero tolerance on it instead of humouring it as they did in the above examples. Whilst the female players took the above examples with jest I found it to be rather juvenile.
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[quote="SOMCHAI"]In Tyt, I have seen one such player often referring to "hand Shandys", and another directing the term of "opening your legs" (this example actually involved OP and she joked along with it), this among other sexual innuendo. Little things like this can foster an atmosphere of being allowed to say the wrong things. The female players really need to call zero tolerance on it instead of humouring it as they did in the above examples. Whilst the female players took the above examples with jest I found it to be rather juvenile.[/quote]
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#9 2019/11/19 09:30:02 |
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SAL3M |
"SOMCHAI"In Tyt, I have seen one such player often referring to "hand Shandys", and another using the term of "opening your legs" (this example actually involved OP and she joked along with it), this among other sexual innuendo. Little things like this can foster an atmosphere of being allowed to say the wrong things. The female players really need to call 0 tolerance on it instead of humouring it as they did in the above examples. Whilst the female players took the above examples with jest I found it to be rather juvenile. Let's not go on some mad SJW purge of any sexualized jokes please. If you're offended by the term hand-shandy, which is blatantly hilarious, you need to chill out. The line should be drawn when the woman says that she doesn't want to take part in those kinds of jokes with you and you apologize and stop. If they're in on the joke and nobody is being offended then what is the problem? Why does everything have to boil down to an authoritarian 'zero tolerance' approach rather than an even-handed one based on consent and apology when you cross a line?
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[quote="SAL3M"][quote="SOMCHAI"]In Tyt, I have seen one such player often referring to "hand Shandys", and another using the term of "opening your legs" (this example actually involved OP and she joked along with it), this among other sexual innuendo. Little things like this can foster an atmosphere of being allowed to say the wrong things. The female players really need to call 0 tolerance on it instead of humouring it as they did in the above examples. Whilst the female players took the above examples with jest I found it to be rather juvenile.[/quote]
Let's not go on some mad SJW purge of any sexualized jokes please.
If you're offended by the term hand-shandy, which is blatantly hilarious, you need to chill out.
The line should be drawn when the woman says that she doesn't want to take part in those kinds of jokes with you and you apologize and stop.
If they're in on the joke and nobody is being offended then what is the problem? Why does everything have to boil down to an authoritarian 'zero tolerance' approach rather than an even-handed one based on consent and apology when you cross a line?[/quote]
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#10 2019/11/19 09:37:53 |
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SOMCHAI |
I'm not offended by any of this, quite to the contrary. I used the word juvenile which is very different to being offended. Read the post again if you didn't understand.
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#11 2019/11/19 09:45:18 |
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SAL3M |
"SOMCHAI"I'm not offended by any of this, quite to the contrary. I used the word juvenile which is very different to being offended. Read the post again if you didn't understand. Yeah but you're calling for a zero-tolerance policy on it as I understand from your post? That was the meat of my complaint about your post plus it is obviously disingenuous to describe something as 'juvenile', which is normally used in a pejorative sense, and then claim that it is quite the contrary to being offended. At a minimum, you're describing the fact that you disapprove of the use of that language.
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[quote="SAL3M"][quote="SOMCHAI"]I'm not offended by any of this, quite to the contrary. I used the word juvenile which is very different to being offended. Read the post again if you didn't understand.[/quote]
Yeah but you're calling for a zero-tolerance policy on it as I understand from your post?
That was the meat of my complaint about your post plus it is obviously disingenuous to describe something as 'juvenile', which is normally used in a pejorative sense, and then claim that it is quite the contrary to being offended.
At a minimum, you're describing the fact that you disapprove of the use of that language.
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#12 2019/11/19 10:05:58 |
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GROSBURR |
That kind of thing should be punished. Take a screenie and send to GMs, hopefully they can ban the chars on that IP.
It is evolution and genetics, men are hardwired to be like this, even me, although I'm not an idiot. Sorry you have to put up with that. |
#13 2019/11/19 10:10:57 |
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SABREWOLF |
"SOMCHAI"I'm not offended by any of this, quite to the contrary. I used the word juvenile which is very different to being offended. Read the post again if you didn't understand. Shut up buffy you tool. |
#14 2019/11/19 10:25:34 |
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FOXOSAURUS |
As said to coffee, just report it and let the GM's decide. If something is upsetting you that much, its worth sending. Take screenshots and send to iSylver via discord or email.
There's a reason rules exist. |
#15 2019/11/19 10:32:06 |
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